Only in Texas

Washington, D.C. may lay claim to the Smithsonian. New York has Broadway musicals. Here in Texas we have.... we have.... the yearly Fort Worth Stock Show and the State Fair of Texas. The depths of our pioneering roots, is seen in the heights of our culture at both of these events.

I actually prefer the Fort Worth Stock Show. Where else can you get so much for your money? You can amble by the cattle pens and get a first hand look at prize bulls and dairy cows. Sheep and goats are sheared right before your eyes. The smell of the barnyard is mixed with scents of chili and smoked turkey wings. Haute couture of Texas is in abundance as men and women in Western shirts, jeans and 300 dollar boots mingle in the crowd. Throw in a trip to the rodeo at the end of the day and it is all about satisfaction.

Now the State Fair of Texas is definitely about the food. Vendors fry anything that can be put on a stick or ladled in and out of a hot grease vat in two minutes or less. You can savor a corny dog and onion rings and follow it with a fried Twinkie. But the pinnacle of gastronomic experience was at the jalapeno eating contest this year. The winner is Rich Lefevre of Nevada, who downed 247 peppers during the eight minute contest. Sonya Thomas of Virginia, came in second place consuming 239 of the peppers. In Texas we like to play by simple rules: Don't spit on the sidewalk, open doors for the ladies, and call your elders "Sir" and "Ma'am". The rules for the jalapeno eating contest are simple too: You can drink a liquid as a chaser and don't throw up.

And I do have to wonder who sponsored this event. Hmmmm? Maybe the makers of "Preparation H"? I can just imagine the adventurous mood in the bathroom when the winners in this gastronomic challenge decide to jettison their hundreds of peppers back into the sewage system and resume their normal lives.

Tammy Swofford
tammyswofford@yahoo.com